None of my coworkers prioritize their animals like family and I have no equestrian coworkers. I am the only one. I have one coworker that literally says "she hates her dog" and keeps him locked in the garage and I have another coworker who gave his dog away because they didn't feel like taking care of it anymore. The other coworkers don't even talk about their pets. It's all about their children and husbands...all day long...blah.
For the longest time I felt guilty asking to leave early to take care of my sick horse or meeting the farrier. The expression on my boss's face said it all, she didn't consider it important. In the meantime I had coworkers working from home because their "knee hurt" (wtf?!), kid was sick, stove was being delivered, or needed to meet a contractor for their home. When I asked to leave work early 2x a week my boss kind of dragged her feet and obviously had a problem with it. When I told her what it was for and pointed out that others were working from home and leaving early she justified those coworkers schedules with life changing events that were a life priority. So my sick horse wasn't a priority? I could have flipped out on her, but I didn't. I am sorry I haven't rushed into marrying the first guy I see and start pumping out babies, but that doesn't mean I don't have a family, responsibilities, or a life outside of work. Every night I went home to my horse and my dog...that was my family! That was my priority! Basically my boss told me my life didn't matter. I started to resent her.
Part of resenting her was to determine how much a horse was really like a child, a way to prove to myself that I was right and she was wrong. A horse still is not a human life, but for now they are my "children." They are so much like children it's ridiculous:
1) Money. Kids are expensive. Average day care costs are about $575-$700 a month. Guess who else is in day care? Your horse, especially if he is at a boarding stable. You have someone watching over them, feeding them, providing turnout entertainment. It's the same thing and around here it costs about $675 a month.
Not to mention all the farrier bills, vet bills, and equipment. Just like children who also have medical bills, routine appointments, and often need things for school, clothing, toys, etc.
2) Time. Horses take up a lot of time. Taking care of them is a part time job, feeding on schedule, cleaning, meeting the farrier or vet, picking up hay. If you aren't taking care of them yourself then you are stuck driving somewhere to see them.
Think about it, a baby wakes up and cries for a bottle. You are on a schedule to feed that baby. Horses need to be fed at the same time as well, they are on a schedule and if they don't get fed bad stuff starts happening; colic, gastric upset, and even kicking down a wall. They get really annoying when they are hungry, just like babies crying for their bottle.
If you need to meet your farrier or vet or riding instructor, that's just like a mother needing to bring her kid to football practice, picking them up from school, or leaving early for a school play. Everything is on a schedule.
3) Commitment. Sure, accident pregnancies happen but I would say most couples plan their babies now-a-days. It is just too expensive to have a kid and not plan for it's arrival. Once you plan to have children you are making a long term commitment to take care of them, raise them, providing them food, an education. Horses need commitment too. They cost money, take time, and once you acquire them you will more then likely be stuck with them for the rest of their lives. With the cost of horses right now, people don't just sell them easily anymore. You have to accept the fact that you will own that horse for years.
4) Horses need candy, so do kids. Horses beg for treats. Kids beg for candy bars and cookies.
5) Both need attention. Horses need and like to be groomed, bathed, showered with treats. They like to do stuff, go on trail rides, jump, gallop. Kids need attention too, they need compliments, you need to watch them play sports, help with their homework, and generally just play.
7) Both have life chapters. Both horses and kids hit chapters in their life, where their life changes and they move on. Kids go to college, join the military, or get married. Horses go to new owners, full time training, start showing, become lesson horses, change disciplines, or move into a pasture retirement. At some point both kids and horses move onto different chapters in their life, sometimes it means they move on without you.
8) Bragging. Parents brag about kids making varsity track or getting straight "A"s on their report card. Horsie Mommies brag about how their horse learned flying lead changes or finally moved up in the jumper division. Both are proud of their babies and need to tell everyone about it.
9) We also talk about when they are bad. I have told my friends about my horses spook or how my new project horse took off bucking on me. Parents often complain about their kids not doing their homework, talking back, or missing their curfew. As must as we love our "kids", both types will disspapoint us from time to time.
10) Sometimes when they are bad, it's the parents fault. Your kid may have dropped the f-bomb because they heard you say. Your horse may stop at the jump because you set him up wrong in the approach. Sometimes parents mislead their children, no one is perfect.
11) Facebook status updates. Pictures of kids and status updates are often a topic on facebook. Horses make the same appearance, today alone I have seen my friend's funny clip job and have 2 other friends have their horses packed up in the trailer off to a horse show.
12) Pictures, pictures, and more pictures. When you kid plays dress-up you take a picture, when my horse sticks his tongue out at me...I take a picture. :)
13) Love. You don't spend all this time and money because it is about you, you spend all this time and money on a horse because you love them. They ARE family. Parents feel the same way about kids.
I love my horses. I may have not crossed the bridge into getting married and having children, but right now they are my children.
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